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| me + Bash |
I have pretty bad vision. Without my contacts or glasses I cannot see anything, and even my glasses cannot get my vision crisp. I have a restriction on my drivers license, and I struggle to drive at night due to some other eye issues.
I have sjogren's, which is an autoimmune disorder that can attack the eyes; mine does choose to attack my eyes. I am prone to having my eyes dry out, and I have special drops to use for that. I also am prone to corneal ulcers and as a result my eyes are scarred which further impairs my vision.
My depth perception is slightly skewed, and that's really what affects my riding. It has gotten worse in the past few years, and with barrel racing I sort of need to be able to perceive where the barrels are and where I need to set my horse up to run to. I'm adjusting slowly.
It's one of the reasons I haven't pursued my coaching. I need to be able to see well in order to coach well. I can help quite a bit, and it's easier from the ground rather than riding myself. But my eyes hurt.
I am extremely photosensitive, so going out in the sun is painful for my eyes. There aren't sunglasses strong enough to help. And then at night my vision struggles in low light. It's really just a no win. I'm working on solutions and learning how to adapt.
Driving is scary at times, and if I have to drive in low light conditions I'll typically decline unless my partner can drive me. If I'm having a painful eye day then I absolutely cannot drive. I won't put other people in danger that way when I cannot see. All of this is making the pursuit of my dreams a little difficult, but there are solutions and I'll find them.
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