YOU CAN SIT WITH ME

YOU CAN SIT WITH ME

Tuesday, August 20, 2024

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PopTart & Me

What's with all the mean girls?

Through various reasons like it's the height of summer in the desert where I live, PopTart is still nursing Karma, Hootie is out of shape (and I'm not going to get a 20 year old gelding into shape when it's 100 degrees out), and Bash is working on being starting I haven't been riding. I've also had some health struggles which are way worse in the summer. 

All of this to say I've been online more than I typically like to be. Because I've been online more, I've been trying to be more involved in the local horse scene. I also wanted to coach more, but I'm mostly cured of that now. And this type of behavior is partly why.  

I am sure that no matter what area you're in there are the cliques and the bullies and the mean girls. I just typically never notice because I'm so busy doing my things. This summer I just didn't have many things going on, so I got to do a lot of observing and talking to people and listening and learning. 

I know I've written about this before, but it weighs heavy on my mind. It weighs on me because for every supportive person I see cheering others on and encouraging them and offering helpful insights, I see double that making fun of folks for any number of reasons. I've seen people getting made fun of for not having a $3000 saddle or not driving brand new rigs or having a grade horse or their weight. I've seen some people doing both things. They'll have multiple social media accounts, and on one they're sweet as honey while on the other one they're lower than a snake's belly in a wagon rut. For those ones, I just wonder...do they think we can't see it's the same person in those videos? 

Anyway, if you're local to my area and I'm ever hauling some to a local jackpot or event, feel free to sit with me. I'm probably bringing some out for exposure or to work out some issues, my truck and trailer aren't brand new, and I'm currently riding in a Hilason because I couldn't afford to spend $2K+ on a new saddle no matter how much I wanted one. I have stuff that I can afford without going broke and it's safe, fits my horses, and works for now until I can afford more. 

Now don't get me wrong, I'll judge the hell out of someone who runs injured horses, abuses one, runs one that is underweight, and if you watch you'll see me cringe at the mouths gaped wide open as the rider balances on the reins and yanks at a horse who is already giving their all while whipping them with an over-under. I'll never judge a beginner, or someone trying their best to get with their horse, or anyone genuinely trying and being a partner with their animal no matter what tack they have on or what they pulled up in. 

Some of y'all need to learn some damn manners. 

 

 

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ANXIETY AND HOW I DEAL WITH IT AT EVENTS

ANXIETY AND HOW I DEAL WITH IT AT EVENTS

Thursday, August 15, 2024

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Many of y'all know that I have anxiety. 

And not the regular anxiety that everyone gets. I have several mental illnesses including bipolar (which creates anxiety), OCD (mine focuses on obsessive thoughts, so when I get anxiety I cannot stop thinking about it), PTSD (which intensifies anxiety, specifically in certain situations), and then Generalized Anxiety Disorder. 

I deal with these mental illnesses through medications and a variety of skills I've learned in therapy. I have done both DBT (dialectical behavior therapy) and CBT (cognitive behavior therapy). In both of these I learned skills to help break the cycle of obsessive thoughts and retrain my brain to focus away from anxiety. 

One of the things I utilize is the 5-4-3-2-1 Things method. For this, I focus on five things I can see, four things I can touch, three things I can hear, two things I can smell, and one thing I can taste. This pulls me out of my head and makes me focus on things outside of myself. 

I also focus on box breathing also called battle breathing, bomb breathing, or a few other names. Find that method by clicking here. This method allows me to focus on my breathing which turns my mind off and relaxes my body. 

If I am feeling super anxious, I do not get on my horse as all of that anxious energy will transfer to them. I will hand walk them and focus on my breathing or the five things until I feel a little more under control. 

Prior to the event, I focus on spending time each day with my horses. Then I remind myself that I did this and nothing bad happened. I focus on all the times I was successful with my horses instead of honing in on the bad things. I also visualize my runs or rides going smoothly every day. I do this before the run as well. 

While at events I rarely socialize, and I don't watch every other rider. I will watch a few to see how the ground is holding, then I just focus on my horse and myself. Listening to music helps or visualizing perfect runs for myself and my horse. There are tons of methods to minimizing anxiety and fear, so find the ones that work for you. 

I talk about mental health every Monday on my personal instagram page Click Here! I often share tips for overcoming anxiety and not letting it stop you. Along with other mental health and mental wellness tips and ideas. 

A few years ago, I made a vow to confront the things that scare me. I overcame my fear of birds. I'm more at ease driving on highways, and I'm working on my fear of heights. Immersion therapy is not always effective, and you truly have to be in the right head space. But I wanted to not let my fear do things that I truly love. 

I love riding horses, and I love barrel racing. Having my confidence destroyed by an ex impacted me in so many ways that I am healing from. Ultimately, I decided that I wasn't going to let him continue controlling my life and keeping me from doing things that I love. Although I will always deal with anxiety, I am finding ways to minimize it and do things that I need to do or love to do even when it scares me. 

If you struggle with mental health, I highly recommend therapy and a medical professional to see if you need medication and therapeutic intervention. I know, without a doubt, that these things have saved my life on more than one occasion. It is great to reach out on social media or follow people who share their mental health journey, but NOTHING can replace medication and therapy. 

Follow me on social media for more! 

 

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